6 Therapist Tips — Talkspace
6 Tips to Help Save Your Marriage
If you’re committed to saving your marriage and sure that you’re not dealing with any deal breakers, dedicate some time to each of the following therapist-approved tips. Healthy unions between spouses require routine effort and dedication from both partners. Keep in mind that before you put in the work, it’s virtually impossible to improve your relationship without your spouse’s active participation.
What does it take to save a marriage? The following should be present:
- Both partners recognize there are problems
- Both partners understand that they play a role in the problems
- Both partners maintain a certain level of respect for each other and keep the marriage out of an abusive category
- There are more good times than bad.
- Both partners are willing to make the effort to save it
Looking for specific strategies that can be effective in getting your marriage back on track? Check out the following six tips that you can use right now to try and save your marriage.
1. Work on intimacy
Sure, we all get busy in life. It’s easy to fall into routines and become so preoccupied that we forget to be attentive to our partner’s needs. However, an intimate connection between married partners is essential for maintaining your marriage.
Give some thought to what you can do to make your sexual life with your spouse more interesting and fun. A healthy sex life is a key part of a strong married life, and successful couples put forth intentional effort into making their sex lives good.
“Eliminate distractions to protect the partnership.”
2. Talk to each other regularly
Knowing how to save your marriage largely involves working on communication. It’s one of the main components of maintaining the type of deep connections that let marriages last forever.
Wondering how to communicate in a relationship effectively? Talk with your spouse openly about your interests, dreams, goals, feelings…even about what frustrates you. Don’t forget that half of communication is listening. Allow and encourage your spouse to share everything they hesitate to tell anyone else. For more tips, check out these communication exercises for couples.
“Practice the art of asking more questions.”
3. Enjoy spending time together
One really important, simple way to save your marriage and connect with your spouse is by being cognizant about spending quality time together. Don’t let yourself get so caught up in the business of life that you forget to just be together.
“Start carving out space for date nights once weekly.”
Remember that you got married to share your lives and achieve your dreams together. Even if your time is limited, making date night a priority can help. It can just be watching a movie and ordering a pizza at home — it can do wonders for your marriage.
4. Practice forgiveness
Forgiveness is one of the answers to how to fix a broken relationship. Holding grudges will only damage a relationship. If you feel contempt towards your partner regularly, and you can’t find any resolution, it can cause serious long-term challenges for your marriage.
There’s power in forgiving, especially when you can do it quickly. Remember that forgiveness is a gift to the person you forgive, and to yourself. Don’t hold grudges that will only eat up your emotional and mental space. The truth is, holding a grudge can have a negative impact on more than just your marriage. A recent large study shows that holding onto anger and stress is linked to higher blood pressure and heart rate reactions.
5. Don’t be controlling
Partners in healthy marriages mutually respect each other and don’t constantly demand that they get their own way. Any successful marriage is built on the premise of give and take. Allow your partner to have the space they need to be the person they’re meant to be.
6. Consider talk therapy
If you feel that you’ve put in a lot of effort, but are still falling short and you’re beginning to worry about the possibility of divorce, it may be time to consider online couples counseling.
An experienced couples therapist can offer various exercises for you and your spouse to explore. Sometimes, we can all benefit from a fresh perspective and professional advice, especially when it comes to knowing how to save a marriage.
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